Posted in Mental Health, Self Esteem, Self Help

Overcoming low self esteem – so begins my journey into the real world

This weekend I finished working through my self-help book Overcoming Low Self Esteem by Melanie Fennell. For me, this is now where the journey really begins. I now have the tools to fight these demons and hopefully build for a more confident future.

I know I have to work at this, to use the methods in the real world. It won’t be easy and I expect the occasional relapse but the key is not to give up because I know that when I have put each method into practice during the book, I’ve felt better afterward.

Do I feel more confident? No
Do I feel my drive and determination returning? Yes
Do I feel like a failure? These days, rarely
Do I still feel self-conscious about things? Yes, but far less than I did and less often. I still get nervous when talking about myself and my interests but I’m getting better at it.
Do I feel despair? Sometimes but that is more to do with my current situation than any long-standing issues.

I’ve stopped calling myself “useless”, “pathetic”, “weak” and “stupid”. I’ve stopped the automatic assumption that if something doesn’t go right it is because I am incompetent or incapable of carrying out simple tasks.

It hasn’t helped with everything. I still feel that I have no attributes attractive to the opposite sex (sometimes even that I am repulsive) and that I’m destined to a life on the shelf. This is mostly because I have no contrary evidence to challenge it with. But if things don’t improve I know I can contact my psychosexual therapist.

Over the coming weeks I will discuss the methods in greater detail and how it has helped so far and how I expect to proceed with an action plan.



I go by the name of Frank Speaking. My blog "In the Mind of Men" (former name Chin Up, Chest High) started out as a chronicle of my mental health recovery. Now it is a forum where I discuss issues related to male mental health.

2 thoughts on “Overcoming low self esteem – so begins my journey into the real world

    1. Thank you. I know I will, on the bad days I just have to remember how far I have come.

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