I had my first date in two months this morning. A simple coffee affair and the usual chat. This girl (I’m going to call her Grungegirl as her fashion style is slightly like that) approached me on one of the dating sites. Her message was thoughtful and addressed my profile. So far so good.
The age range I’m looking for is 30-40. I am 37 years old and so far I hadn’t dated anyone out of that range. The youngest was Ubergeek at 31; the eldest Little Red at 38 (she’s now 39). The remainder were scattered around the middle.
This girl is 23. She pointed out that though she was out of my age range, she would like to chat. I was hesitant but relented. After all, my experience is that women are not great at making first approach so any that does deserves a response out of courtesy. And I always said I’d reply to anyone who sent me an intelligent and coherent message and this girl certainly did just that.
We’ve chatted for a week and had lots to talk about. I became more at ease the more we talked. Ahead of our date I was still hesitant and cautious because of the age gap. Images of being stalked by a bunny boiler and declarations of undying love were at the back of my mind, as was the idea that she is after a father/ big brother figure (part of the problem in my marriage was this needy aspect of my ex wife) but our lengthy conversation by text revealed her to be intelligent and thoughtful. My other concern is that she’s after a sugar daddy (but I’m poor!) The only way I was going to know was by meeting her; so I asked her out for coffee.
So how did we get on and how do I feel now about the situation now we’ve met?
I enjoyed her company, found her very straight-laced and interesting but I don’t think there’s anything there. She didn’t give the impression of attraction and I didn’t fancy her. I see a friendship but nothing more and that’s the vibes I get from her too. The age gap is not even a factor in this opinion.
How do people feel about age gaps in general? Does the old cliche ‘half your age plus seven years’ apply or is age but a number?