Posted in Dating / Relationships

The “Plenty of Fish” profile template for women

Photographs should include some of the following

  • Cleavage shot and / or shot of bare thighs while lying on bed
  • Pouting selfie
  • One photograph of multiple people where it is not clear which of them you are
  • You drinking a cocktail (two or three of these is preferable)
  • You at a major international landmark
  • You holding somebody else’s baby (niece, nephew, Godson etc)
  • Your cat(s)
  • Your horse(s)


  • Just looking
  • Looking for my best friend
  • Wants fun and romance
  • Anything that includes the word “spark”
  • Any honest/decent men left?
  • Looking to see what’s out there

Intro paragraph should include one of

  • I never know what to write
  • I hate talking about myself
  • Friends describe me as…
  • Not very good at this but…

Generic interests – choose any four of the following

  • Going out to bars
  • Staying in with wine and DVD
  • Cocktails
  • Prefer pubs to clubs these days
  • Days out
  • Seeing family
  • Seeing friends
  • Meals at home
  • Meals out
  • Gym
  • Yoga

Choose any number of negative statement

  • Too many weirdos on here
  • No time wasters
  • No creeps or pervs
  • Been treated badly by men from here
  • If you’re married jog on
  • If you’re not over your ex jog on
  • No decent men on here
  • Fed up – leaving soon
  • I’ve been out on over 100 first dates and everyone has been unsuitable

Choose one contradictory statement

  • Require tall, dark and handsome / looks don’t bother me
  • I’m an independent woman / first date: I’ll go along with whatever you decide because you’re paying
  • Don’t want a man  who flashes money around / first date: expensive meal and then a cocktail bar

50% of your profile should discuss one of the following

  • How you live for music – list your top 100 favourite bands
  • Your nieces and nephews or friends’ children and how much you adore them
  • All the countries you have visited and the ten you want to visit this year
  • The failings of previous partners and why the breakdown was entirely their fault

Finish off with one or two of the following

  • Anything else you want to know, ask me xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Not a fan of endless emails
  • I want a real man
  • Specify a minimum height requirement
  • Refer to a celebrity you really fancy and express a preference for somebody who looks like him (typically Ryan Gosling). Best used with the “looks don’t bother me” comment above.


I go by the name of Frank Speaking. My blog "In the Mind of Men" (former name Chin Up, Chest High) started out as a chronicle of my mental health recovery. Now it is a forum where I discuss issues related to male mental health.

4 thoughts on “The “Plenty of Fish” profile template for women

  1. LOL. And if I did do the online thing, I would probably do half of those, even though I see how dumb it is in your post, it just seems like the thing to do. omg
    It’s like an extension of Instagram and twitter or something. Have you seen Instagram? Lost of pics like that.

    1. Just trying to help out here 🙂 When you’ve seen that many profiles, the cliches, it tends to frustrate you. If you ever do sign up for online dating you know what not to do!

      I don’t look at instagram but I’ve heard about it – what you say does not surprise me

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