Posted in Dating / Relationships

Who Would Be a Man Online Dating?

A most interesting state of affairs right now. As a man on a dating site, you expect sometimes to send lots of messages and never get a single reply. In one week you might send 25 and get no responses yet the following week you might send three and they all respond. I’m sort of in that situation right now and I have possibly three dates coming up this week.

On Saturday, a girl on POF looked at my profile about three times in the space of 24 hours. Clearly she wanted to message me but did not pluck up the courage to do so. So I made the approach. She responded favourably and we’ve traded a few messages now.

Also on Saturday, I was approached by a girl on OKCupid living in my town and we’ve been trading messages the last couple of days. On Sunday I received a response to a girl I sent a message to a week ago. We have made a connection, have already spoken on the phone, had a laugh (always good) and scheduled a date. So I am now talking to three separate women who will no doubt in the next day or so be expecting to be asked out on a date. Assuming I meet all of them they will be 11th, 12th and 13th women I have met through online dating respectively.

How did somebody who believed himself too weird, too unattractive, too boring and too quiet and not having qualities that any woman would want, end up meeting so many wonderful women in such a short space of time? Sure, none of these have become relationships (potential with only two so far), two became clear friendships and the rest I’ve not seen again. But the over-riding feeling has been that we have all enjoyed each other’s company.

Yes, I’m not doing badly considering. But now I have a dilemma. What if I meet all of them, what if I enjoy the company of all of them and what if I want to see all of them again? That could get complicated and expensive! I’m just enjoying the ride right now and I know I have nothing to worry about until/if one of these looks to be heading in the direction of something serious.

Online dating – it is a funny old game.



I go by the name of Frank Speaking. My blog "In the Mind of Men" (former name Chin Up, Chest High) started out as a chronicle of my mental health recovery. Now it is a forum where I discuss issues related to male mental health.

2 thoughts on “Who Would Be a Man Online Dating?

  1. What a great dilemma that would be!
    When you change your mind, you change your life ( I just read that somewhere). You are thinking of yourself differently adn seeing results for it!

    1. And looking forward to the payoff 🙂

      I now have dates confirmed with two of them. One this Saturday (the girl I had the phone call with) and another in a week’s time (the girl who kept coming back to my profile). I’m expecting to really like both of them, especially this one on Saturday. The third one has flaked out already. No great loss, I have my hands full already!

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