Posted in Dating / Relationships

The State of my Love Life

If it were an exam, my love life would definitely be a case of “must do better this year” that’s for sure! But one step at a time, things seem to be going so-so and last year was great in terms of actually getting dates, just not so good at turning dates into dating or a relationship. I must admit to feeling a little down toward the end of 2013 because of the sheer number of so near yet so far situations and I did momentarily feel sorry for myself at yet another Christmas as a singleton. I soon shook myself out of it though.

However, I feel I need to give an update because things took a liiiiiiittle bit of a twist yesterday.

Mirror Image: We’re not in a relationship but we can’t really be said to be dating either because we live so far apart; yet we are far more familiar with each other over long distance compared to others after one date. We do have daily contact and there is a lot of flirting and water-testing. She has asked me out to dinner to a place near her and similarly, I have recommended a restaurant near to me I would like to take her to. We are planning on meeting again this month. So, are we in a flirtationship? Amusingly, thoughtcatalog has listed the “rules” of a flirtationship. For the record: 4 (without the butt slap), 5, 6, 9, 12, 14, 16, 19.

Indiechick: She has been standoffish, she has been blowing hot and cold and failing to give me firm plans. A week before Christmas I deleted her number from my phone expecting never to hear from her or see her again. I felt I had sufficiently made my feelings clear that I wanted to see her again so naturally there came a point where I gave up and every time I give up, she seems to pick up interest again. I heard from her yesterday. She claims to have been busy and quite ill in the run up to Christmas. I cut to the chase and asked her if she wants to meet up again. I am in no mood for games and I wonder sometimes whether I am merely an ego boost for her. We are meeting next weekend – I’m keeping an open mind.

Ubergeek: Not a name I expect to be mentioning if I am honest and I have been trying not to wonder how she is considering it is roughly a year since we first met. I sent her a text a few days before Christmas – all I did was wish her a Merry Christmas and all the best for 2014. So far she has failed to respond; this is the first time a text message of mine to her has gone unanswered. I am trying not to read too much into that as it could mean anything. At one end it could mean that she is getting married this year and wants me to disappear now as a momentary blip during a bad patch in the relationship, and at the other end of the extreme it could mean they are having problems and doesn’t want to complicate things by bringing me back into her life. I’m not thinking about it especially as I’m feeling quite into Mirror Image right now. Never underestimate the tenacity of the flames that we carry.

So, keep your fingers crossed for me that something pans out here!



I go by the name of Frank Speaking. My blog "In the Mind of Men" (former name Chin Up, Chest High) started out as a chronicle of my mental health recovery. Now it is a forum where I discuss issues related to male mental health.

5 thoughts on “The State of my Love Life

  1. Well, you ‘learned’ to date last year and this year you will ‘learn’ to take it to the next level. The beauty is that this time you are going after exactly what you want and know more than you did the first time around!

    1. Amen sister! I have a date with Indiechick this weekend – against expectations if I am honest

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