Posted in Dating / Relationships

“Faint Heart Never Won Fair Maiden”

That old cliché – though it refers to a man “being a man” and having the courage to approach a woman that has attracted his affections, it could arguably be applied to any situation where we might need courage in the face of doing something difficult or brave. But here I definitely mean in the pursuit of my romantic life, something that used to set my heart racing about a thousand beats per minute. But recently I have stopped and realised just how bold I have become.

brave soul! But not half as brave as confessing romantic feelings sometimes 😛

To Ubergeek: “I’m disappointed you got back with your ex because I really like you and I felt were were going somewhere”

To Mischief: “Yes I am attracted to you, I don’t know what gave you the impression that I wasn’t and I have flirted with you. I thought we were doing ok and yesterday I felt we had a real connection.”

And now to Mirror Image. She told me this week that she plans to meet Jealous Guy some time before the spring so to be up front with her, I told her that Indiechick had got back in touch and wanted to meet up again. We are meeting for lunch this Saturday by the way. Her response was that if Indiechick was interested in me that she would gladly bow out.

My response was that I have a number of reservations about Indiechick and her emotionally unavailability, that I wasn’t sure how I felt about her and I wasn’t even sure if I fancied her. And then I said it. I came straight out with it:

“Besides which, I fancy you”

I didn’t even think about it as I typed out those words: “I FANCY YOU”. I didn’t even flinch as my fingers spelt out those words declaring my preference for her. I didn’t hesitate when my mouse hovered over “SEND” on OKCupid. I think the reasons for this boldness are threefold:

  • I can get dates. It’s no longer a disaster of epic proportions if somebody does not share my feelings – I can move on to the next one
  • Realising that keeping quiet is going to get me nowhere (i.e. the title of this post)
  • More confidence in myself and a new-found “have a go” attitude

It’s funny, I’ve spent most of my life worrying about making my feelings known, worrying about how the woman I was pouring my heart out to was going to respond. But now, every step of the way I have been far more forward about not just those who do interest me, but those who don’t. I am persistently being bold about putting balls back into their courts.

Just waiting for the payoff now 🙂



I go by the name of Frank Speaking. My blog "In the Mind of Men" (former name Chin Up, Chest High) started out as a chronicle of my mental health recovery. Now it is a forum where I discuss issues related to male mental health.

3 thoughts on ““Faint Heart Never Won Fair Maiden”

  1. Romantic feelings are hard to share! Which is why I hardly do it, lol! Kudos to you, it’s always good to be honest. At least Mirror Image knows what’s up and can make a more informed decision on what she wants to do.

    1. That surprises me about you actually, you come across as the sort of girl who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to just go for it.

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