I haven’t been this nervous since my second date with Ubergeek which probably goes some way to telling you just how much I want things to work out. I’m travelling to see Mirror Image tomorrow and will be staying a few days. I know we will get on, so it is not that that I am nervous about. I am not nervous about the red rose I intend to give her, nor am I nervous about how tomorrow’s dinner date might go – I’m sure it will be fine, just like the day after that.
No, I am nervous about making all of “the moves”. Mirror Image has little confidence in herself, this will all be relatively new to her. Remember, she has had one boyfriend – it was last year and it lasted three months. That is the sum total of her relationship experience. There is no way that she will take the lead in taking things to the next level and I realise I am going to be the one to do it.
I have to be the one to initiate the flirting, I have to be the first to reach out for her hand… and I have to be the one who moves in for the kiss. I can’t tell you right now just how much I want to kiss her and though I am not putting undue pressure on myself, if I return on Sunday having not at least tried, I think I will go stark raving mad. So I am trying not to put pressure on myself but it is not easy considering:
a) It has been over three years since I had a passionate kiss and
b) It is close to 15 years since I kissed somebody new (my relationship and marriage lasted 12 years or so).
I am feeling a little rusty and once again feeling like a teenage boy – damn the hormones of the hopeless romantic! I am not worrying, but the nerves associated with moving in for the kiss are at the back of my mind.
Wish me luck guys!