Posted in Dating / Relationships

Going Away Together

Since I met her parents, my girlfriend (sorry, but I do get a warm fuzzy glow typing that) has been dropping a lot of hints – actually no, not hints, she has specifically said – that she would like us to go away together in the summer. Not for long, just a 3-4 day break and we are looking into our options right now.

The last time I went away with a significant other, it was to a Mediterranean island with my ex-wife. We booked it before our marriage broke down, decided not to cancel as it may have been the time alone we needed to save our marriage, and by the time it came around we knew it was over and decided to go as a kind of “swan song” to all the trips we’d taken. There was lots of tears from both of us and only one argument that was based on a silly misunderstanding. It was then that we decided we would never argue again… and we haven’t argued since.

That was then, and this is now. I am once again in a relationship and I always thought that going away with somebody new would be a big step, something to mark and maybe even feel like the final tie of my marriage severing (after all, she was my first relationship) and we had had in the region of 30 holidays and mini-breaks over a 12-13 year period. It is a big step, and when you’d become so used to always going on holiday with one person to now be going somewhere with somebody else – especially if there is a strong chance you will be visiting somewhere you previously visited – is going to take some getting used to.

It’s been difficult not to talk about previous holidays. Of course she knows when I say “we” went here and really loved it, she doesn’t need to ask who the other part of the “we” equation is – it’s obvious. Which is why I have felt uncomfortable recommending places that “we” went before, even in some cases the same hotels or hotels nearby due to personal experience. it’s difficult not to, we did a lot of travelling in the years we spent together. It doesn’t seem to affect Mirror Image and we have been fine talking about past experiences with our exes.

We aren’t going abroad, neither of us have the budget for that, it will be a short break somewhere in the UK. We’re both very keen for our first chance at “us” time away from everybody else and she has been very enthusiastic for “privacy and snuggling” time.

So I guess it could be said to be going well – now we’re going away together. Life feels good 🙂



I go by the name of Frank Speaking. My blog "In the Mind of Men" (former name Chin Up, Chest High) started out as a chronicle of my mental health recovery. Now it is a forum where I discuss issues related to male mental health.

5 thoughts on “Going Away Together

  1. It’s definitely a good thing to get some trips for “the new us” under your belt. I know exactly what you mean when you talk about your gf knowing knowing who the “we” is when you talk about past trips. This trip, and the many others that will hopefully follow, will help establish some new memories, some new history and put “the old us” into more of the distant past.

    1. Absolutely 🙂

      We haven’t chosen what we are doing or where we are going yet but I am looking forward to the first of my new memories.

  2. Sounds like it’s going very well! I was quite worried about the first holiday away with my boyfriend but it turned out to be fine, we didn’t argue at all. If it’s meant to be you’ll have no trouble being with each other 24/7! It’s a new chapter so focus on present and future and forget about what went before. Don’t let the past influence the present! Have a great time and don’t forget to write a report on it for us!

    1. Hello and welcome back (I guess a lot has changed since your last visit!)

      I will indeed send a travel report 🙂

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