There is no two ways about it – men are objectified in society for our success, wealth and status. It is expected of us from ourselves, from women, from our families and from society in general. Man objectified for what he has is as damaging as woman the sex object, yet few notice and even fewer care. Christian Grey personifies how the contents of a man’s bank account is more important than the content of his character.
Stop being a pussy, grow a set, be a man.
Feminists think this is privilege.
Get a job.
No, get a better one, one that pays you more. I don’t care if you’re happy in this one or that a better paying one makes you miserable.
Why don’t you have a better job? Why won’t you get a better job? Aren’t you a real man?
If this is supposed to be privilege then why the pressure to succeed? Why the stress and anxiety? Why the condemnation of men who opt out? Why are decent men who work at McDonalds “losers” if they are happy in that job? If something is driving thousands of men to take their lives every year, then I contend that that is not a privilege.
It is a sentence.
When people talk about male privilege, it usually refers to the domination of men in business and success in general. What isn’t really talked about in society, and certainly not by feminists (because perhaps it’s avoided as in inconvenient truth), is how much pressure we put on men to succeed and continue to succeed and to prove their worth in their successes.
When Andy Murray won Wimbledon in 2013, ending 77 years of British drought at the games’ premier tournament, only after he won was he asked whether he would now marry his fiance. This is the sort of shit we get all the time. “Now you have finished university will you marry her?” “Now you have got that promotion, will you marry her?” “Now you are world champion, will you marry her?” Hey, you deserve her now so we give you permission to consider yourself a worthy human being.
This is how we objectify men – that we only “deserve” a woman’s love and attention and hand in marriage when we have accomplished something and proven that that accomplishment is enough to deserve her.
Yet still we champion success and ambition as “male privilege”. Rarely does this pressure feel like privilege, rarely does this demand to succeed and condemnation of failure to live up to it feel like an honour, rarely does opting out of these games feel like a privilege, rarely does seeing broken men feeling like failures taking their own lives in despair feel like privilege, rarely does having such high suicide rates blamed purely on “toxic masculinity” feel like privilege.
When you go through life feeling you will never be successful enough, rich enough or powerful enough – all the time being condemned for holding people back because of that success – it never feels like a privilege. Sorry feminists, but it’s about time you checked yours too.